Things men do during sex that men hate

Read the 15 things below – which contains adult
content (obviously, but you’ve been warned) –
and then maybe print it out and leave it where
your boyfriend can see it…
1. When they try to recreate sex positions that
they’ve obviously seen on some online porn site,
and you end up basically doing a headstand,
looking a mess and having to listen to them say:
“You’re loving that aren’t you babes?” Err, no.
2. When you’re on top and they’re just staring at
you and it’s like, ahhh what face do I pull? So
you just close your eyes and hope for the best.
3. When they ask YOU to put the condom on.
Just no.
4. When they think it’s sexy to spank you so
hard that you just want to turn around and punch
them in the face.
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5. Asking “do you like that?” How about just
don’t talk and see if I look like I don’t want to kill
myself/watch TV over your shoulder.
6. When you give them a blow job and they act
as if you don’t have a gag reflex. How about I’m
sick all over your penis?
7. When they ask you to strip (which is always
awkward – what music do you put on?) and
then your skinny jeans get stuck round your
ankles.
8. When they see random things they’ve read
online and think they’re a good idea. Err no, I
don’t want ice rubbed all over my body.
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9. When you’re in the middle of foreplay and
they thrust a finger up your bum with NO
warning.
10. When they drag it out because they’re
waiting for you to orgasm first. You’re going to
be waiting a while for that…
11. Being passive aggressive when they can’t
make you orgasm. So sexy.
12. Not cleaning properly. It’s not attractive to
taste urine.
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13. Trying to remove underwear with their teeth.
What even is that?
14. Putting their fingers everywhere at once like
they’re playing some sort of instrument. Far too
confusing, you just don’t know what’s going on
down there.
15. Trying to go down on you in the morning
when you’re feeling really unsexy and unclean.
Just gross.